"Bring in that Star Spangled Banner girl instead!"
Read More »GOP Convention Attendees Gets Awkward As Prayer Leader Goes Carlebach Style
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Aging Cantor Blasts ‘Synagogue Elites’ Who Seek To Replace Him
"Concerns over my mental acuity and physical stamina are being used to mask political machinations."
Read More »Community Shocked: Chabad Family Has No Sons Called Menachem Mendel, Shneur Zalman
"Something doesn't add up."
Read More »Man Thinks Group With ‘Crazy’ Safeguards To Prevent Sins, Try To ‘Trick God’ With Technicalities
He has acknowledged he has no knowledge of Hebrew, Jewish hermeneutics, or Talmud.
Read More »Yeshiva Dropout Suggests IDF Avoid Genocide Charges By Using Bullets ‘Sold’ To A Goy
"We do it with chametz," he argued.
Read More »Islamic Martyrs Too Late To Heaven: Natives Already Sacrificed All The Virgins
"Given the lack of prophecy, we could not issue updates."
Read More »Gaza Haggadah Inflates Number Of Dead Palestinian Children Instead Of Number Of Plagues
The sum reaches "more than the population of the Gaza Strip."
Read More »Expanding Definition Of ‘Al Aqsa’ On Track To Include Entire Levant By 2034
"Al Aqsa only seems to expand in directions associated with the presence of Jews."
Read More »If Not Now Seder Advanced To Friday Morning
They cannot afford to squander such an opportunity to piggyback their political agenda onto an ancient tradition.
Read More »Elders Forget Gentile Blood; Jews Forced To Use Water In Matza For 3,336th Year In A Row
"Preferably the blood of a Christian child, but that's more custom than anything else. There weren't any Christians yet at the Exodus."
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