Copenhagen, February 17 – As the Danish ban on Jewish ritual slaughter of animals went into effect, Denmark’s Ambassador to Israel dismissed the notion that such a law reflected any antisemitic sentiment, since the rescue of Denmark’s Jews from the ...
Read More »Category Archives: The Rest of the World
Feed SubscriptionHonest BDS Activist Lives Off Grid, Forages, Avoids Medicine
Somewhere near Beach Lake, Pennsylvania, February 15 – Oscar Thorpe is a rare specimen indeed: a political activist who completely practices what he preaches. In his case, his adherence to the Boycott, Divestment, and Sanctions movement against Israel has led ...
Read More »Jesus At Second Coming: ‘What Are All These Goyim Doing Here?’
Jerusalem, Israel (AP) – Jesus of Nazareth, proclaimed the King Messiah by his followers and a spiritual guide to nearly two billion people, after returning as promised, expressed dismay this week at the nearly absolute non-Jewishness of those who venerate ...
Read More »Security Council Demands Israel Stop Being So Goddamn Moral
New York, February 2 – The United Nations Security Council endorsed a statement this morning calling on Israel to stop providing medical treatment to wounded Syrians, saying that the practice conflicts with the negative portrayal of Israel the body wishes ...
Read More »Chabad House of Mecca To Close
Mecca, Saudi Arabia, January 31 – The joke remains relevant, but poignantly less so now: you might find Coca-Cola in the holy city of Mecca, but you will no longer find a Chabad shaliach. After three years of keeping the ...
Read More »UN Insecurity Council Denounces Self
New York, NY (AP) – Meeting behind closed doors because of what others might think of them, the United Nations Insecurity Council took up the matter of the violence in and around the West Bank and Gaza Strip, and wound ...
Read More »Jewish Communities Discovered Outside New York
New York, January 24 (Duh) – Jewish leaders are reeling in the wake of the discovery that there are functioning Jewish communities beyond the New York area. It has long been accepted that individual or small groups of Jews might ...
Read More »Study: Not All Jew-Haters Want Jews Shot
Some want them gassed, burned, drowned, crushed, buried, dissolved, beheaded or impaled Phoenix, AZ (Reuters) – A Ku Klux Klan poll has found unexpectedly diverse attitudes among Jew-haters. Where researchers expected to encounter broad agreement with the sentiment that Jews ...
Read More »World Pulls Jaw Muscle While Yawning At Beirut Bombing
New York (AP) – The world was treated for a pulled jaw muscle today after yawning at the car bombing in a Beirut suburb yesterday. Doctors at New York’s Bellevue Hospital reported that that patient was admitted to the ER, ...
Read More »Media Outlets Rush To Update Pending Sharon Obituaries
New York (AP) – A rapid deterioration of former Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon’s condition has journalists scrambling to update their files in case the publication of an obituary becomes necessary in the coming hours or days. Sharon, 85, suffered ...
Read More »