China Cancels Adoption Of Judaism, Fearing Muslim Nations Will No Longer Endorse Its Repression Of Muslims

“The precedent of the Jewish state of Israel, which engages in all the same activities as any other state but somehow attracts inexplicable venom from the Muslim world, indicates what awaits China should it embark on this Judaism policy.”

Beijing, September 5 – The People’s Republic of China stepped away today from an anticipated policy that would convert its 1.4 billion citizens into Jews after realizing that the numerous Muslim-majority states and entities giving its abuse of the Muslim Uighur minority political and diplomatic cover will likely withdraw their support for that abuse once the perpetrators are Jews.

The Ministry of the Interior issued a statement Thursday morning announcing the cancellation, effective immediately, of a five-year plan to impose Judaism on the entire population as a way to buttress China’s financial and banking prowess. The plan, developed in 2015, aimed to leverage the longtime association of Jewishness with money management excellence, but now the administration of President Xi Jinping has reversed course upon determining that certain unacceptable consequences will accrue from such a move, most dire among them that the many governments now endorsing China’s suppression of Uighur religious and ethnic identity will reverse those decisions when the country becomes Jewish instead of atheist and anti-religion.

“A reassessment of the risks led the government to decide against adopting Judaism for China in the end,” the statement read. “While financial and economic prowess will serve the people of China, especially in the shadow of unjust American tariffs, our strategic needs point to greater engagement with the Muslim world. Alienating those dozens of countries that produce natural resources China needs will negate, or possibly worse, whatever economic benefit the people stand to gain from Jewish banking aptitude. China will therefore continue to ‘reeducate’ Uighur Muslims, intern them in concentration camps. suppress their indigenous culture, and restrict their rights even more than other Chinese citizens, but will do so under a banner that claims no religion, no opiate of the masses.”

“China respects Judaism for its contribution to the world’s culture and economics,” the statement continued, “and respects Jews such as Karl Marx for their work in shaping the world. This admiration, however, cannot mitigate the real diplomatic, political, and economic danger inherent in doing what China has always done but doing it while Jewish. The precedent of the Jewish state of Israel, which engages in all the same activities as any other state but somehow attracts inexplicable venom from the Muslim world, indicates what awaits China should it embark on this Judaism policy. The People’s Republic has decided it unwise to put the country’s economy at risk by making all 1.4 billion of its citizens targets of Muslim antisemitism.”

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