Corbyn Invites Friends Hamas, Hezbollah, To Combat Labour Antisemitism

Persistent accusations and documentation of antisemitism have dogged Labour under Corbyn since the start of his term.

London, September 27 – Newly-reelected Labour Party leader Jeremy Corbyn promised to improve his approach to addressing concerns of anti-Jewish prejudice in the ranks of his organization today, saying he would enlist his friends from the Islamist movements Hamas and Hezbollah to lead the effort.

Persistent accusations and documentation of antisemitism have dogged Labour under Corbyn since the start of his term, as well as accusations that the Opposition leader has failed to take adequate steps to eliminate the phenomenon. Even the internal investigation into the phenomenon has been suppressed, prompting Jewish Labour activists and Jewish advocacy organizations to question the MP’s commitment to fighting it. To counter that impression, Corbyn told reporters today he had invited some political allies with combat experience to take a vanguard role in his redoubled efforts to root out antisemitism from Labour.

“My friends in Hamas and Hezbollah have significant experience in combat of the less conventional sort,” he boasted. “They have just the right attitude toward things, I think, and that will be an asset to Labour as we pursue what is just and what is right.”

Corbyn declined to offer specifics as to what moves Hamas and Hezbollah would make that Labour has yet to make without them. “Suffice it to say that their thinking is less, shall we say, conventional than our British sensibilities, and so can be more flexible when to comes to thinking outside the box for original ideas.”

An aide who spoke on condition of anonymity suggested that the two movements might simply augment the current trend in Labour vis-à-vis antisemitism, which primarily consists of denial, justification, and deflection, activities they have pursued in their own contexts for decades. “As I see it, Hamas and Hezbollah have enjoyed success in their public campaign and media operations where Labour has faltered,” he noted. “That, I believe, is the primary angle Mr. Corbyn seeks to follow. At heart he’s a cautious man, so I do not foresee a radical shift in the assumptions governing the party’s treatment of the issue even with our new partners in the endeavor.”

The aide explained that the two Islamist groups have succeeded where Corbyn has failed on the same front, namely minimizing public attention to their anti-Jewish rhetoric and policies while taking no steps whatsoever to alter those policies. “I predict that within three of four weeks we should have a battle plan, if you will, for this new operation.”

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