“Those Zionists still do not know what hit them.”
Gaza City, May 9 – The Islamist terrorist group that rules this coastal territory, desperate to show the effectiveness of its violence against Jews, claimed credit this morning for causing large numbers of fires across Israel last night.
Hamas spokesman Fawzi Barhoum claimed in a radio address Tuesday that Israel attempted to cover up a massive rocket barrage that hit the country all of last night, resulting in fires all over – some still burning into the daytime. The extensive coverup, he insisted, included suppression of any sounds of rockets, explosions, Iron Dome interceptor launches, launch alert sirens, or other phenomena typical of such Hamas attacks on Israel.
“We know that teams of Zionists rushed to gather around the sites of the fires to dance and sing, to cover up the shame of their defenselessness,” stated Barhoum. “Our mighty silent undetectable missiles struck the enemy where he is most vulnerable – in open areas where piles of wood had been gathered for weeks, and municipalities had set aside specific spots in advance for bonfires. Those Zionists still do not know what hit them.”
By astounding coincidence, observers reported, every site that Hamas claimed to have hit has featured Lag BaOmer bonfires on this date of the Hebrew calendar for at least several years, on some cases decades. Emergency medical personnel reported a bout two dozen cases of minor burns and a handful of more serious cases, all of which they attributed to negligence – an attribution that Barhoum claimed proves his assertion that Israel covered up the true nature of the fires.
Israelis exploited Lag BaOmer to conceal their existential terror, piggybacking on a tradition that dates back hundreds of years: lighting bonfires on the thirty-third day of the Counting of the Omer – linking Passover and Shavuot – to mark either the end of a plague that killed thousands of Rabbi Akiva’s disciples, or the revelation of the mystical teachings of the Zohar (“Radiance”) to Rabbi Akiva’s disciple Rabbi Simon Bar-Yohai. The liturgical chanting, roasting of marshmallows, cookouts, music, and dancing all served to mask the abject fear from Hamas rockets. So all-encompassing and impossible-to-face is the fear that the Zionist minds repressed all memories of sirens, explosions, and running for shelter amid a wasteland of wreckage that appeared to be confined to places where nothing could be wrecked except some wooden pallets.
Belatedly, other Hamas figures rushed to take credit for all the explosions in the skies over Israel on the night of Independence Day, dismissing all the videos of celebratory fireworks displays as “fake news.”
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