Hamas Commander Not Sure About Wife’s ‘Live, Laugh, Love’ Kitchen Décor

“You’re not some Karen in the American suburbs who wants to speak to the manager; you’re the wife of a warrior for Islam.”

Gaza City, January 19 – The leader of an Islamist militant unit focused on confronting the Zionist menace by means of attack tunnels and hidden booby traps expressed misgivings today about his spouse’s choice of wall art to festoon the space between their refrigerator and cooktop, a three-word admonition that she considers inspirational and he deems insipid.

Muhammad Bakri, 34, who holds a rank more or less equivalent to major in the Izzadin Al-Qassam Brigades of Hamas, voiced his displeasure Tuesday morning at his wife Basma’s decision to put up a “Live, Love, Laugh” sign in the kitchen of their apartment in the Suja’iyyah neighborhood of this Mediterranean city. Bakri stated that he cannot fathom the superficiality behind such an interior decoration move, especially in the face of compelling alternatives such as Koran verses or Hadith teachings extolling martyrdom, portraits of leaders and fighters slain by Israel, or images of the Dome of the Rock in Jerusalem.

“It’s the inanity that gets to me,” lamented the father of six and munitions expert. “Woman, I know the kitchen is your space and all, but what in Allah’s name are you thinking? You’re not some Karen in the American suburbs who wants to speak to the manager; you’re the wife of a warrior for Islam, of a man whose noble pursuits will someday see him march in triumph over the corpses of the Jews on his way to liberate Al-Aqsa, or become a glorious shaheed in the attempt. Embody that.”

Mr. Bakri conceded he will probably not confront Mrs. Bakri directly about the sign. “It’s not worth the friction,” he acknowledged. “Yes, I can beat her until she takes it down and replaces it with something worthwhile, but that’s not my husbanding style. Certainly that’s what the neighbors and my colleagues in the movement might expect, but it’s not for me. I think I’ll drop a few subtle hints during dinner, such as ‘That sign is ugly as sin,’ or ‘If that “Live, Love, Laugh” stays up, I’m going to attach it to an incendiary balloon and send it toward an Israeli preschool.’ She should get the message.”

Friends of the family noted that this marks at least the third time in the last decade that Muhammad and Basma Bakri have shown differences in domestic sensibilities; one neighbor recalled an episode during the 2014 war with Israel in which Basma insisted her husband kiss their toddler good night, while Muhammad preferred to make himself scarce in case the IDF destroyed their building, which was in use as a storage depot for Iran-made Fajr-5 rockets.

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