Hitler Miffed At Holocaust Deniers Denying Him His Glory

“If they like and admire me so much, as they claim, why do they do that?”

Umpteenth Circle of Hell, December 17 – Former leader of Nazi Germany Adolph Hitler expressed disgust and exasperation at people who seek to deny his genocide of Jews in the 1930’s and 40’s, Stygian sources report.

The Führer, as he was known, laid out in unequivocal terms his intentions for the Jews of Europe in his seminal work Mein Kampf in the decade before his rise to power, and then oversaw increasing persecution of Jews once he was appointed Chancellor. Under Hitler’s direction, the Nazi apparatus systematically isolated, dehumanized, and finally saw to the industrial-scale extermination and enslavement of millions of Jews across the continent and into North Africa. That effort, the achievement of Hitler’s eleven-and-a-half years in power to which he was the most devoted, remains the subject of various campaigns to deny or minimize what became of the Führer’s defining mission for his society, or to claim that others stood behind it, not he. That phenomenon of denial and deflection continues to infuriate Hitler seventy years after he committed suicide in a Berlin bunker.

“I wouldn’t be here suffering eternal torment of this magnitude if I didn’t cause almost six million Jews to die in pain, fear, and degradation,” fumed the former head of the Third Reich. “Seeing a resurgent Jewish society, and a powerful, sovereign Jewish State is torture enough for me, and a measure of divine justice. Idiots who think it helps me feel better to see them trying to deny what I was all about just make it worse. If they like and admire me so much, as they claim, why do they do that?”

Satanic sources noted that the terms of Hitler’s eternal damnation call for a specific and precise measure of everlasting suffering and shame, and that the balance of those elements is disrupted when Holocaust deniers add their hate-filled distortions to the mix. “Many, many people try to co-opt Hitler’s antisemitism and corrupt the record of his behavior to suit their hate,” explained Beelzebub. “Perversely, those people make things worse for their idol by denying him even the momentary credit for achieving much of what he set out to do.”

Beelzebub observed that aside from adding to Hitler’s suffering, those who would deny or minimize his crimes against the Jews demonstrate remarkable inconsistency in their thinking. “They admire the man for his unprecedented and uniquely effective efforts to rid the world of Jews, yet claim he never made them, or intended them to be far less murderous than they actually were, which is selling him short, which negates the reason for their admiration of him.”

“Wow, wrapping my head around that one hurt ME,” said the demon.