Man Viewing Diaper Change Through Prism Of Israeli-Palestinian Conflict

“I don’t think we would feel the need to use a Diaper Genie if we were truly comfortable with the way we oppress, exploit, and paternalize the Palestinians.”

Tel Aviv, March 17 – A local father performing diaper-changing duties is struggling to frame the task in the context of the ongoing national conflict with the Palestinians, household sources reported today.

Magvo Nim, 32, was heard to remark as he reached for the wet wipes for the fourth time today, “This tendency and desire we have to clear away the unpleasantness and dirt, then cover up the source of the problem as if we’ve taken care of it for the foreseeable future is symptomatic of our treatment of the Palestinians.”

Nim, a stay-at-home father who chose to quit his marketing job to enable his wife to return to work after maternity leave, also observed that Israeli society would have a healthier attitude toward waste disposal if it did not try to cover up the stench of poop or try to keep it out of sight. “I don’t think we would feel the need to use a Diaper Genie if we were truly comfortable with the way we oppress, exploit, and paternalize the Palestinians,” he remarked, referring to a type of diaper disposal unit that encloses a used diaper in a sealed plastic bag and stores it in a tightly closed compartment to prevent the smell from permeating the room.

“We have this psychological need to make cosmetic changes that don’t address the underlying problem, and only exacerbate it the next time it happens,” commented Nim as he dabbed zinc oxide cream on his daughter’s rashy bottom. “If we were serious about resolving the conflict we’d address its fundamental causes instead of just flinging blame at entities beyond our control and only reacting to the symptoms. Essentially, if our approach toward the conflict were governed by a healthy general attitude, you’d also see me discussing my wife’s diet with her in an effort to eliminate or reduce foods that make her milk more likely to contain things that alter our baby’s urine content to the point that she gets these skin inflammations when she pees.”

“The Occupation has made this a brutal society,” he added. “If we weren’t keeping millions of people under our boot, afraid to let them out for fear of terrorism, I’d definitely be more gentle and patient when I have to get up in the middle of the night to change a poopy diaper and the clothes she soiled as result of my putting on her last diaper improperly because I haven’t slept more than ninety minutes at a time in two #%$@ months and OH GOD NOW THERE’S POOP ON THE BEDSHEETS TOO I’M GOING TO KILL SOMEBODY. THIS GODDAMN OCCUPATION!”

At press time the baby’s diaper had once again fallen off and, in an act of peaceful resistance, she had urinated all over the iPhone her father left on the changing table.