Muslim Representative Refuses To Forswear Congressional Pork

Analysts admitted confusion that the apparent hypocrisy has not caused conservatives to pounce.

Detroit, January 16 – A freshman Congresswoman whose religious faith enjoins her from the consumption of porcine flesh nevertheless intends to indulge in significant pork during the coming legislative session.

Rashida Tlaib (D-MI), who describes herself as the first Palestinian-American woman in Congress, announced to her Michigan constituents at the start of the session last week that she will now begin making good on her campaign promises, among them an infusion of Congressional spending projects in her state, which has suffered decades of industrial decline and stagnation. An aide denied that Ms. Tlaib’s religion prohibits her from bringing home the bacon.

“This is about the people of Michigan’s thirteenth district, first and foremost,” insisted staffer Barmil Lahm al-Khinzir. “Any attempt to bring the Congresswoman’s faith into the picture is a distraction at best and malicious religious prejudice at worst. The district, State of Michigan, and country have more important, constructive challenges than whether any particular Muslim likes pork.”

As examples of such Michigan-centered issues, Ms. al-Khinzir cited the power of the pro-Israel lobby, the admirable people who support the Lebanese Shiite terrorist organization Hezbollah, and the importance of flip-flopping on endorsement of the Boycott, Divest, Sanctions movement targeting only the Jewish state.

The new congresswoman made headlines two weeks ago after exhorting her colleagues and constituents to impeach President Trump, employing a choice term of profanity. Coverage of the incident again brought to prominence Ms. Tlaib’s Muslim heritage, but her commitment to pork drew no attention even in that context.

Analysts admitted confusion that the apparent hypocrisy has not caused conservatives to pounce. “Right-leaning outlets made a lot of political hay over her reversal on BDS, from opposing it during her campaign to supporting it once elected,” noted Joe Scarborough of MSNBC. “Along with that, she endorsed a two-state solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict before the elections, but reverted to earlier support for a one-state – meaning, no Jewish sovereignty – solution after securing her seat. So it’s surprising to see her devotion to pork not being seized upon by political opponents as yet another example of hypocrisy or inconsistency. Maybe they’re waiting for her to actually vote for pork before pouncing, but that’s not like them.”

Chris Hayes of CNN seconded the confusion but offered a possible rationale for hitherto Republican silence on Ms. Tlaib’s love of pork. “Perhaps they see her as doing their job for them,” he posited. “They don’t have to say a thing and she keeps making their case for them.”

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