Muslims Furious That Jews Not Blamed More For Missing Plane

Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, March 26 – In the continuing mystery surrounding the exact circumstances that led to a Malaysia Airlines aircraft disappearing into the Indian Ocean, the Muslim world is expressing outrage that the obvious perpetrators, the Jews, are all but absent from the content of official discussions of the investigation.

Flight 370 from Kuala Lumpur to Beijing veered of course and all but severed contact before disappearing two weeks ago. Investigators from Malaysia, China, Australia, and other countries have pooled their efforts to pinpoint where the Boeing 777 went down and what may have caused it. Despite data from satellite and radar records, several troubling unknowns persist, which, obviously, is a red flag for Jewish guilt.

Among the continuing enigmas of the incident are the fact that no one attempted to communicate with anyone outside the plane during the six hours it flew off course over the Indian Ocean, despite the availability of satellite phones, and what sort of mishap or malfeasance could adequately explain the change of course and why it was not corrected. The very existence of such uncertainty has Muslims scratching their heads at the relative lack of accusations leveled at Jews and Israel in official circles, and fury that the obvious culprits are going to get away with yet another heinous misdeed.

“The default assumption must be that the Jews, either collectively or through the Zionist Entity, are behind any destructive occurrence that could be the work of humans, plus several that could not be,” said Arab League Secretary-General Nabil Elaraby. “We find it unconscionable that the avenues of investigation into a tragedy in which so many citizens of a Muslim nation, Malaysia, have been affected, do not include the obvious, namely, that the Jews are to blame.” He lamented that the default assumption has weakened in recent centuries, especially in the Western world, when it could serve well in both simplifying solutions to existing problems and preventing recurrences.

To illustrate, Elaraby noted that dozens of questions could be satisfactorily answered by the simple premise that Jews had, through sinister means, seized control of the aircraft by hacking into its guidance system and compromising the communication systems. Jewish computer expertise is well known, and the deaths of non-Jews as the Jewish holiday of Passover approaches has been a recurring theme, as Jews require the blood of gentiles to make their matza.

Logic thus dictates that in order to perpetrate the murders and drain the blood from the corpses undetected, the Jews decided to make hundreds of non-Jews disappear without a trace, and could retrieve their blood at will while the rest of the world was staring at satellite images of debris in the ocean.

“It baffles and infuriates me that these obvious angles of inquiry are going ignored,” said Mahummad Bashir, president of Sudan. “They want us to believe it was a mere accident – but then, maybe they think we’ll believe anything. Well, we’re not that stupid.”