It mandates specific attention to Israel regardless of the situation there or elsewhere, and has resulted in more condemnations of the Jewish State than of all other nations combined.
Sinai Desert, March 19 – Frenzied diplomatic activity in advance of the Almighty’s revelation to the Israelites in the wilderness has Muslim countries lobbying heavenly forces to include in the anticipated divine pronouncements a permanent requirement to hold public discussion and issue public condemnation of Israel’s treatment of Palestinians.
The fifty-seven constituent members of the Organization of Islamic Cooperation seek to place the Palestinian issue in as central a place as possible in the anticipated Decalogue, representatives explained, both to demonstrate the importance of working for a just resolution for their Palestinian brethren, and to focus as much attention as possible on Israeli actions so as to avoid unwanted focus on their own, far worse, human rights violations. In so doing they aim to mirror the OIC’s success in engineering the inclusion of Agenda Item 7 in the routine sessions of the United Nations Human Rights Council, which mandates specific attention to Israel regardless of the situation there or elsewhere, and has resulted in more condemnations of the Jewish State than of all other nations combined.
“We need the Ten Commandments to reflect our values,” declared OIC Secretary-General Yousef Al-Outhaimeen of Saudi Arabia. “Such a foundational event and text that will sit at the very center of so much of human civilization and culture must incorporate the most important fundamental guiding principles, most especially justice for Palestine. Any attempt to detract from attention to that issue represents a crime, and every member of this organization has agreed to work to convince the divine powers that be to ensure the inclusion of Agenda Item 7.”
Obstacles to the initiative’s success include the fact that no such place or nation as “Palestine” will exist for many centuries. “That might seem a minor or technical point,” cautioned analyst Travis Dee, “but in fact in might prove even more insurmountable than the fact that the OIC has no allies to speak of in Heaven at the moment. They can cajole, threaten, or otherwise attempt to influence recalcitrant angels, but there’s that big sticking point right there.”
“Also, if it’s supposed to be ten statements – ‘commandments’ is an inaccuracy – Agenda Item 7 will necessarily have to push out something else,” he continued. “That one’s less of a problem, though, since the addition could simply replace something the OIC members feel less necessary to include in the list, such as ‘Thou shalt not murder,’ ‘Thou shalt not steal,’ or ‘Thou shalt not covet they neighbor’s house.'”
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