Police Beat Stranded Motorist Wearing Reflective Yellow Vest

“Disruptions of law and order occur in close connection with these vests, as events in Paris demonstrate.”

Credit: Magnus Mertens via Wikimedia Commons

Jerusalem, December 17 – Law enforcement personnel pummeled a man wearing the signature uniform of a violent anti-government protester this morning, only to discover after the fact that he had donned the garment for visibility purposes following the breakdown of his vehicle at the side of the road.

Police reports indicate that an officer in a patrol cruiser spotted the yellow-vest-wearing suspect at approximately 7:30 Sunday along a stretch of road between the town of Mevasseret Tziyon and the capital, and called for backup. Ten minutes later, a second cruiser arrived, bearing two policemen, who, with the first, surrounded the vest-wearing man and began to hit him with nightsticks, boots, and fists. The policemen cuffed the subdued anarchist and bundled him into one of the cruisers, whereupon they discovered his phone lying at the side of the road with an exchange of text messages on the screen indicating he had put on the reflective vest after getting out of his stopped car, to help alert other drivers to his presence. The identity of the motorist remains undisclosed.

A spokesman for the police expressed regret over the incident, but explained that in the current environment of anti-authority fervor and its close association with the yellow vest, law enforcement cannot take threats lightly. “Disruptions of law and order occur in close connection with these vests, as events in Paris demonstrate,” stated Jerusalem-area Deputy Commissioner Mot LaRoche. “You simply cannot be too careful under these circumstances. Of course we apologize for any unpleasantness, but such occurrences are likely in this political and media environment. I urge everyone to avoid wearing yellow vests.” Since 2004, reflective yellow vests have been a mandatory automotive accessory in Israel, to be worn upon exiting one’s stopped vehicle on intercity roads.

Sources at Hadassah Medical Center at Ein-Kerem described the man’s condition as serious, with multiple fractures, head trauma, and contusions about the arms, face, and back. “The patient is stable,” reported an ER physician. “We do not yet have a complete picture, but we do advise the public to refrain from risky behaviors of the sort that can lead to such incidents.”

Observers considered the injured motorist fortunate. “He’s lucky he didn’t look like a Jew trying to pray on the Temple Mount,” remarked one news anchor. “We all know how that’s the most dangerous kind of person, and I can’t imagine the measures the police would take had they thought him one of those.”

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