Scientists Glimpse Israeli Genocide Of Palestinians In Other Universe Where It Actually Happened

Analysts differ on which Nobel Prize the discovery merits: physics, peace, or literature.

Cambridge, MA, November 3 – Researchers reported this week they have managed what many are calling a tantalizing look into a long-theorized dimension of existence outside our own, in which organized massacres and systematic Zionist attempts to exterminate non-Jewish inhabitants of the Holy Land did in fact take place.

A series of experiments at Harvard University’s Smithsonian Institute for Astrophysics and several other allied facilities around the world resulted in a brief look at another universe, the scientists reported in a press release, a universe that appears to resemble this one in most respects but for the occurrence in the glimpsed universe of an actual genocide of Palestinians at the hand of Jews establishing and securing a homeland of their own in what is now Israel and the territories it controls. A full write-up of the discovery has a tentative publication date of January 2021 in the journal Science.

Astrophysicists, quantum physicists, astronomers, particle physicists, mathematicians, and a total of more than four hundred scientists and engineers at eight scientific institutions worldwide collaborated on the unprecedented work, which integrated observations of matter-antimatter dynamics, the effects of gravity, subatomic particle behavior, and numerous other disciplines in an effort to open a lens to a realm that has been inferred, but never directly observed. The effort allowed the researchers to gain a snapshot picture of a small portion of a realm with different physical laws, a difference that accounts for the occurrence of a Palestinian genocide in that universe, when in this one the Palestinian population has mushroomed and no evidence of any such genocide exists outside the fevered imaginations of the malignant or deluded.  The groundbreaking discovery of a universe in which this universe’s Palestinian propaganda is actually true already has members of the scientific community mouthing the words “Nobel Prize.” Analysts differ on which prize the discovery merits: physics, peace, or literature.

“‘Unprecedented’ doesn’t even capture the momentousness of this,” gushed lead researcher Professor of Quantum Mechanics Jen Ninjeninn. “The scientific aspect of this achievement is astounding enough, and I can’t even begin to describe it. But it goes beyond that. We finally have proof of what Palestinians and their supporters have been yelling for decades: the Jews are the new Nazis. That incontrovertible fact has now been observed and documented by the world’s leading scientists, and it’s a mere technicality, as far as I’m concerned, that the fact is only a fact in some other universe.”

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