‘Students For Justice In Western Sahara’ Protests Nonexistence

Students for Justice in Tibet, Students for Justice in Crimea, Students for Justice in Nagorno-Karabakh, and several other nonexistent groups expressed varying degrees of agreement.

The type of demonstration that takes place on US campuses only visible to people under powerful hallucinogens.

New York, July 14 – While the plight of the Palestinians gets much attention on college and university campuses across the US, grassroots student movements in support of other people facing occupation find themselves not existing.

Students for Justice in Western Sahara, a group dedicated to generating solidarity with the Sahrawi people under Moroccan occupation since the 1970’s, voiced objection today to the support that Students for Justice in Palestine receive, owing to the difference between SJP existing and SJWS not existing.

“We should exist, by the logic of the Palestine activists themselves,” argued Mohammad, an imaginary advocate for the sovereignty of the North African territory. “If it is a moral obligation to protest against foreign occupation and oppression, then surely it is a greater moral obligation to protest Moroccan occupation and treatment of Western Sahara than Israeli policies beyond the 1949 Green Line, since Morocco has done much worse by any objective measure. So why aren’t there any chapters of Students for Justice in Western Sahara? Or in Tibet? Or Turkish-occupied Cyprus? Or Russian-occupied Ukraine?”

Other figments of imagination echoed Mohammed’s sentiments. “It’s upsetting enough to see SJP at NYU blame Israel for American police shootings of black people,” lamented Anastasia, who only exists in the minds of people reading this article. “Talk about undermining the credibility of the Black Lives Matter movement. But to do so as part of monopolizing liberal rage and thinly veiled prejudice at the expense of causes that are just as worthy, if not more worthy, than Palestine? If I existed, I’d be banging my head against the wall in frustration and bitterness.”

“You know the wall I mean – any of the walls Morocco built in Western Sahara that the world ignores because there’s a security barrier Israel built to prevent bombings, and that’s apparently a big no-no. But, yeah, you go ahead Morocco. Nobody gives a #%$#@.”

Students for Justice in Tibet, Students for Justice in Crimea, Students for Justice in Nagorno-Karabakh, and several other nonexistent groups expressed varying degrees of agreement. “It’s an outrage that we don’t exist,” said SJT, to nods from a figment of your imagination from SJNK.

“Yeah, whatever, I didn’t expect anything at this point,” said Yevgeny, who, if he existed, would be from SJC. “When was the last time anyone stood up to Putin?”

Yevgeny’s despair drew nods from Suha, whose imaginary organization Students for Justice in Syria has worked for years in the nonexistent realm to drum up popular support for intervention to defeat the genocidal Assad regime and its ostensible foe, the similarly genocidal Islamic State. “I remember working with my nonexistent counterparts from Turkey to organize a flotilla to relieve the besieged Yarmouk Refugee Camp,” she recalled. “That worked out about as well as you’d expect. Goddamn SJP.”