Under Trump, Marketers Prepare To Bring Back Aunt Jemima, Uncle Ben

Companies feared getting targeted as racist for “exploiting” the likeness of a minority person.

New York, November 12 – Brands that retired their beloved longtime mascots to avoid “exploiting” the images of minorities to sell their products, now plan to restore those mascots, industry insiders say, in the wake of elections that indicate the sociopolitical tide has turned away from the stifling hypersensitivity of the last several years.

The makers of Uncle Ben’s rice, Land O Lakes butter, Aunt Jemima pancakes and syrup, and of other products that used to feature Black, Native American, or other characters to convey down-home authenticity or purity will bring back those mascots now that American companies have shed their fear of a “woke” backlash in the wake of Donald Trump’s reelection – and, it appears, GOP control of both houses of Congress, as well as a conservative majority on the Supreme Court and a Republican majority among state governors.

“It’s back to marketing basics, thank God,” breathed a VP of marketing at Land O Lakes. “Our Native American woman mascot invited consumers to experience the wholesome natural goodness of our butter, for decades. She said so much without our having to say a word. I’m so glad we can stop worrying about sanctimonious keyboard activists threatening to boycott. Conservatives showed what unapologetic sticking to your guns can accomplish, so that’s what we’re going to do.”

Ben’s Original – the current, post-mascot-removal iteration of Uncle Ben’s – brand manager at Mars, Inc., Tempis T. Pott, disclosed that, pending board approval, the company will go back to using the likeness of “Uncle Ben,” a probably-fictional Black man portrayed as a grower or cook of rice. The original brand saw the product under that mascot become a household name, only to disappear when the company feared getting targeted as racist for “exploiting” the likeness of a minority person.

Quaker/PepsiCo, the owners of the Aunt Jemima brand, plan to bring her back next year. “We started developing a retro ad campaign back in January,” explained VP of Marketing Stu Yott. “There was already a sense back then that the Democrats were going to screw the pooch bigly, and that the cultural tide was turning. Americans have had enough of the scolding, and just ant to live their lives. So we’re going to relaunch our classic Aunt Jemima look, which goes back to the 1880’s, to tap into the nostalgia and the relief that so many Americans feel at not having to tread on eggshells all the time.”

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