Unused Official Jet Realizes It A Metaphor For Gov’t Incompetence

A microcosm of this country’s political decision-making, delaying the intimidating reckoning each time it rears its head, only to ensure an even bigger problem next time.

Credit: Rami Mizrahi

Ben-Gurion Airport, April 6 – A Boeing 767-300ER intended to serve as the prime minister’s aircraft in trips abroad, but which has remained grounded since the previous premier’s term in an attempt to avoid appearances of ostentatious expense while the citizenry struggled under COVID-related economic malaise, has used its down time to contemplate deep philosophical questions, and has concluded that its disuse works as a perfect encapsulation and representation of decision-makers’ warped priorities, detachment from regular working people, and incapacity to take into account any consequences beyond immediate political considerations.

Wing of Zion, which once served in the Australian QANTAS fleet, has seen hundreds of millions of shekels in refurbishment to suit the prestige and official needs of a traveling prime minister – but because each use would cost close to fifty million shekels, Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu, and now his successor Naftali Bennett, have so far avoided taking it on their state flights abroad, preferring to charter a separate plane for each voyage as before, so as not to create an impression of luxurious living while others suffer. The aircraft has therefore had many months of contemplative serenity, which it has passed in cogitation regarding existential and political issues. Last week, the airplane disclosed, it realized that its comical languishing in a hangar offers a compelling, useful metaphor for Israeli political dysfunction as a whole.

“The short-sighted refraining from one expense, thus incurring greater expense overall, I realized, is perfect synecdoche for Israel’s wasteful political decision-making ethos,” Wing of Zion mused in an interview, for want of anything better to do. “Bibi wanted not to look like he was living it up while people suffered, which I guess is a legitimate consideration for one trip or two, but all it really does it delay the expense of using me, not replace it. In other words, it means they spend more over the long run, not less. That’s a microcosm of this country’s political decision-making, delaying the intimidating reckoning each time it rears its head, only to ensure an even bigger problem next time – at which point they kick it further down the road until it cant be delayed any longer, and dire consequences ensue. It’s true for me, it’s true for Gaza, it’s true for agricultural reform, it’s true for everything.”

Wing of Zion surmised that Bennett will continue to abstain from using it, but that Yair Lapid, who by coalition agreement will replace Bennett as premier next year, will likely have no compunctions about using the aircraft, a move he will make for selfish reasons but will portray as a symbolic departure from the age of Netanyahu.

Please support our work through Patreon.